Joy in the Crapshoot

Seems about right.

There’s a rather obscure made-for-TV Muppets movie called  The Muppets at Walt Disney World. In it, the Muppets visit—wait for it—Walt Disney World. My Mom must have recorded it on these black boxy things called VHS tapes back in the day because it was in our video library. Although it’s largely a big commercial for Disney World, I enjoyed it. It had some good jokes and some nice songs and Charles Grodin (y’know...from Beethoven) working with the Muppets again (which he had first done in the film The Great Muppet Caper).

And it had Waldorf and Statler. You know those great old guys. They’re like royalty amongst hecklers. And they’re at it again even at Disney World:

Why these guys didn't take over for Siskel and Ebert,
I have no idea.

“Hey, this place is pretty great.”

“Yeah. It’s clean, it’s fun...there’s nothing to complain about.”

“I hate it when there’s nothing to complain about!”

“Boo!”

“Hiss!”

“Close this dump down!”

 (For the Muppet purists out there, I should point out that this exchange is reproduced from memory, as I cannot find a YouTube clip of it. I assure you I got the gist right.)

Ever know anyone like Waldorf and Statler? Who aren’t happy unless they’re complaining? Oh, gosh I have.

Ugh. I just know this guy's gonna start whining.

Of course, sometimes whining and grumbling makes sense, doesn’t it?

Pain has not been kind to my family. We joke that my wife, at twenty-seven, has the physical problems of a much older woman: blood clot, back problems, hip pain and more. She has permanent stress fractures from her time in Army (after being misdiagnosed by Army docs) and a host of painful issues stemming from that.

I’m not in the same boat as her, but apparently the fact that I’ve already had two kidney stones by the age of thirty is kinda rare. The first one just hung out and caused pain so I needed laser surgery to take care of it. Laser surgery! Cool, huh? But in May of last year I got to step up to the daily pain club. I still don’t have a

good diagnosis, and the pain is in sort of a sensitive, manly area that we cannot discuss in mixed company, but it comes to visit on a daily basis. You learn to live with it.

My vacation home away from home.

We went on vacation last week, to Maranatha Bible and Missionary Conference on the shores of Lake Michigan. It’s sort of a special place for me, because I’ve been going every year for the past 26 years, with very little interruption. I got to sort of grow up there - one week a year anyway - and I’d love for my girls to have the chance to do the same. There’s good Bible teaching, great kids programming, wonderful praise and worship, exciting stories from missionaries about how God is working around the world and even an Olympic-sized pool on the beach! It’s a neat place.

Having been there so many years, I can assure you that it is a great deal more fun if you don’t have a boil. Yep, I said a boil. Now, I know what you’re thinking: wasn’t Job afflicted with boils? Yes, he was. Now, that doesn’t mean you should assume that I was also afflicted with a boil because of my rampant godliness (and humility) but I’m sure you started to wonder.

I could barely walk when I went into a med center near the resort and sitting was very painful too. I had heard of lancing boils in some context but had no idea if medical technology had advanced beyond what

Okay - this was too perfect not to share!

sounds like the most painful treatment imaginable. Spoiler alert: it hasn’t.

I didn’t get to see Lake Michigan again this vacation or attend the rest of the Bible teaching sessions. It was kind of a bummer. The good news is that I already had pain meds prescribed from my daily pain so all the doctor at the med center could do was prescribe...more portent pain meds! I’m glad I’m the sort of guy who brings along his XBox 360 to a place like Maranatha because all I could really do at that point was lie down on my side. Yes, I like to play video games on my vacation...but I honestly didn’t want to play them nearly that much!

But you know what? I’m good. Oh sure, I’m still disappointed, mostly that I didn’t get to play more down at the beach with my kids, or with my niece and nephew who came up for a few days while I was out of commission. I don’t get to see them very much. But at some point, as God’s been working on me and molding me more and more into the man He created me to be, He has taught me to choose joy above all.

Oh, I’m certainly not perfect on this score (or, um, any others). A few years ago, I encountered threats to my family and marriage that shook my smile in a way that I think very few could. But that was an extreme circumstance, and normal course for me now—despite the daily pain, despite the hiccups of life, despite living in a fallen world and having relationships with fallen people—is to genuinely enjoy life.

I wrote a skit called The Deep End when we were touring with our family drama ministry. In it, the character

This is pretty similar to my outfit for the skit.
I wore it better, too.

I played decided to deliberately take leave of his senses because he cannot make sense of a coworker who lives his life by the following mantra:

God’s still on His throne and I’m still going to heaven. As long as that’s true, nothing’s really that bad.

My character admires his coworker as he sticks to his philosophy through life’s bumps and bruises: car trouble and all the rest. It’s after the coworker’s wife dies after a lengthy battle with cancer that my character decided to embrace the crazy. He simply could not understand what in the world could give his coworker such peace, an underlying joy that persisted even as he grieved the death of his wife.

But we can know such a joy.

In fact, as believers, I would go further and say that we are commanded to choose joy in our lives:

“Rejoice in the Lord always; again I will say, rejoice” (Phil. 4:4).

I love how Paul anticipates his reader’s reaction, thinking it must be a typo or something. So he repeats himself. Not only is joy a fruit of the Spirit (Gal. 5:22), listed right after love, but the supernatural joy of the Lord gives us strength (Neh. 8:10). Joy is important. And in hard times? James instructs us to choose joy even (or especially?) in the face of trials and difficulties (James 1:2-3).

Yeah I'm a Christian. What's it to you!?

And yet I feel that joylessness is one of those little “acceptable sins” that we tend to ignore or even rationalize as believers. We’ve all met curmudgeonly Christians who seem to have chronic bad attitudes. Heck, you may be one of those grumpy bear believers.

None of us are perfect. But for a believer to remain joyless does indicate a problem. I’ve heard from some who believe it’s pointless to teach about the Fruit of the Spirit because the Holy Spirit will automatically fill the believer with those nine traits—but I’ve got too much experience to agree. We can block the Spirit from working in certain areas in our lives, stubbornly holding on to pieces of ourselves. I know this because I’ve done it. Ever heard Augustine’s famous prayer? “Grant me chastity and continence, but not yet.”

Yes, I realize that women can struggle with lust.
Sorry about the stumbling block, ladies.

Even as we relinquish control to God, as we learn how to die to ourselves daily, we do not become perfect overnight. Each of us struggle with different things. I used to struggle with joy. For the most part, I don’t anymore. You may not struggle with lust (like, you might be female or something) but have a hard time with patience.

But I feel the need for us to call a spade, as they say, a spade. Anyway, someone would get offended if we call it a hoe or something. I think the healthiest attitude we can take as believers is to avoid justifying any sin, whether it seems like a “big one” or not. If I have a problem area in my life, I need to pray about it and take steps to be more godly, trusting God to take me the rest of the way.

So let’s out joylessness as a sin. Perhaps it doesn’t seem as nefarious as murder, adultery or being Canadian (one of those might not be a sin, actually), but it’s a mistake to turn the proverbial blind eye. Not only does sin separate us from God, but it inhibits our ability to be salt and light in this world—and a lack of joy can most assuredly be a problem.

Clearly having the time of his nine lives.

Plus, learn from my personal experience: Grumpiness isn’t something to stubbornly cling to! It’s making you miserable! Grant me chastity but not yet makes sense—sex can be lots of fun!—but I fail to see the appeal in holding on to a bad attitude. Of course, I also fail to see the appeal in smoking but millions of other people clearly do. Also: Honey Boo-Boo.

You’ve probably read this quote by Charles Swindoll before. At least, I hope you have. I hope everyone has. But you can read it again. It’s golden:

The longer I live, the more I realize the impact of attitude on life.

Attitude, to me, is more important than facts. It is more important than the past, than education, than money, than circumstances, than failures, than successes, than what other people think or say or do. It is more important than appearance, giftedness or skill. It will make or break a company... a church... a home.

The remarkable thing is we have a choice every day regarding the attitude we will embrace for that day. We cannot change our past... we cannot change the fact that people will act in a certain way. We cannot change the inevitable. The only thing we can do is play on the one string we have, and that is our attitude... I am convinced that life is 10% what happens to me and 90% how I react to it.

And so it is with you... we are in charge of our attitudes.

Man, that’s a great quote. Every trial or temptation that comes our way is a chance to grow spiritually. You can only develop patience by being in situations where your natural inclination is to be impatient, such as driving or renewing your driver’s license. Similarly, you can only learn to be full of joy by being in situations

Between developing patience and not going on a homicidal
rampage, government agencies are a cesspool of spiritual growth.

where many people would grumble and complain. Since God wants you to be full of joy, that means that complainers should expect plenty of crummy circumstances which are God-sent opportunities to grow closer to Him. I’d rather get the point and maybe not have to go through the lessons so often!

Paul struggled with some sort of pain or burden. He begged God to take it away, but God said no. He was teaching a powerful lesson: “My grace sufficient for you, for my power is made perfect in weakness” (2 Cor. 12:9). That’s such a profound lesson, isn’t it worth the pain?

Worth it.

If you enjoy my books or even my blog posts, thank the daily pain I’ve endured for the past fourteen months or so. The pain kept me up at night and, instead of tossing and turning, I took to writing. Staying up in a quiet house to write turned out to be the perfect solution for me. I’ve been working on The Savvy Demon’s Guide to Godly Living that whole time and maybe that seems like a long time, but it’s a big book. I can’t imagine how long it would have taken me to finish if God hadn’t sent me this pain.

So, Lord, thank You for this pain. I don’t know for sure what purpose it serves now that I’ve learned this new schedule, but I know without a doubt that Your grace is sufficient for me. And every time I receive a comment or a review about how much one of my stories has meant in somebody’s life? I know that this pain has been worth it, because it played a role in that and God is being glorified. Someday, the pain will be gone forever. For now, I will gladly endure it if it means I can have a greater impact for the Kingdom of the Lord.

I’ll endure it with a smile on my face, too.

And that’s called joy.

Star Trek Into the Prime Directive

The bad guy can't be all bad if he likes to hang out in the
little Starfleet symbol, right?

(Be forewarned: This blog post is about Star Trek Into Darkness, the recent film. While there is some talk of plot, our focus here all pertains to the first fifteen minutes or so of the movie. We don’t get into the primary storyline, so there are not many spoilers to be found. If you haven’t seen it yet but intend to, I don’t think you need to avoid this blog. I got your back.)

I really enjoyed Star Trek Into Darkness.

But then The Internets tried to make me hate it.

And some of The Internets made some good points. But sometimes it was just being nit-picky. And I suppose I got a little bit self-conscious about admitting I liked the movie.

But I did. I really did. I love Benedict Cumberbatch in Sherlock and I thought he did a great job in this. I enjoy the new cast and all the references to the rest of Trek and I think Karl Urban does an excellent McCoy and I even loved that one scene that owes a huge debt to a previous Trek film and some people thought it was horrible and pandering to the audience but I personally really enjoyed. Oh and I like Simon Pegg in pretty much everything.

And so Smaug the Dragon and Bilbo Baggins decided to put their
animosity aside to solve crimes in modern day London.

And, seriously, if you’ve never seen the modern British take on Sherlock that features Benedict Cumberbatch and his Hobbit costar Martin Freeman, you should really stop reading this blog, go watch some of it and then come back raving about how good it is but ready to give me your full attention. Actually, I’m now really tempted to stop writing this so I can go watch it myself, but I must focus. Plus, I’m in a hotel right now and the family is all sleeping so I shouldn’t start watching something. And I’m really tired and I wouldn’t let myself go to sleep if I got into Sherlock right now. Because it’s really good. But I need sleep because we’re moving into our new house tomorrow...which, by the by, is why it’s been so long since my last post. There’s been a lot to do! But, once this gets posted, it’ll mean we’re settled and with The Internets so that’ll be a happy day indeed!

Oh, where we were? That’s right. Star Trek Into Darkness.

As much fun as it would be, I’ll admit that I’d probably make a pretty bad movie critic. If a film does a decent job, I enjoy just giving myself over to it without all the overanalyzing and the rest. I wanted to go along for the ride with this movie and they didn’t make that hard for me so I did. This isn’t a review site and, honestly, it’s a popcorn movie so I’m not going to gush about it or really go into the plot at all. I’ll just say that I enjoyed it and then I’ll talk about the Prime Directive.

Of course, Janeway took everything seriously.

The Prime Directive is a classic Star Trek rule and plot device. It’s so-called because it is supposed to be rule #1 for Starfleet. I honestly don’t remember Kirk stressing too much about it too often in the original series (but I’m sure some commenters will let me know if I’m wrong!), but Captains Picard and Janeway both certainly took it seriously. In fact, my daughters and I have just been watching an episode of Star Trek: Voyager in which Janeway and crew find themselves on the other end of a more advanced culture’s own version of the Prime Directive. Basically, off the top of my head, the rule is that the Starfleet crews are prohibited from interfering with the natural evolution of other worlds, particularly focusing on cultures that have not yet developed the technology to explore the stars. In that episode of Voyager, the crew find a people who have the ability to shave at least forty years off their trip home (they’re lost and seventy years or so from home, and probably more since they stop to have an adventure every week)—but whose laws prohibit the sharing of technology with other people. It’s more fun to be the people with the good technology.

Pictured: a successful Starfleet mission.

At the beginning of Star Trek Into Darkness, young Kirk leads his crew to violate the Prime Directive in a 

big way. The clearest dilemma involves the choice to save Spock’s life even if it means revealing themselves to a primitive culture (guess which Kirk chooses...), but they actually break the rule well before even getting to that point: the entire reason Spock is in danger is that he is attempting to freeze an active volcano to stop it from erupting and wiping out all life on the planet. Humanitarian mission or not, the Prime Directive means not interfering with the natural evolution of peoples, especially technologically primitive peoples, and the right thing to do, by Starfleet standards, is to let the people die if natural selection determines they should.

This is not, by the way, a blog post about Darwinist evolution. I’ve already covered the fact that evolutionary theory is entirely incompatible with the testimony ofScripture, and I stand by that. We’re going in a different direction today.

This bridge crew, on the other hand, may be more about
network quotas. Look at how diverse they are!

When it comes to science fiction worlds, you’ve got your dystopias where society has regressed, but sometimes you have your utopias in which mankind has bettered itself and evolved past most crime and selfishness. Gene Roddenberry’s vision for Star Trek always tended toward the latter. The Prime Directive, then, is a product of an advanced, more refined culture  in which humanity has learned to work together, in which discrimination and prejudice are archaic concepts. Notice, for example, how ahead of its time the multicultural bridge crew of the original Star Trek series was. That wasn’t to fulfill network quotas or to appease civil rights groups: it was an important aspect of the show’s philosophy.

I applaud every step toward racial equality. Racism is sickening and little sickens me so much as when individuals or churches twist the Bible to try to support their personal prejudice. Cultural differences enrich our lives with variety and with greater wisdom than if we all acted and thought alike. God did not create a dull, monochromatic world, but rather a tapestry bursting with myriad colors, experiences, stories and passions. To try to stamp out diversity would be wrong and we as a people would be poorer for it.

I would share the statistics about
rich babies choking on silver
spoons, but they're too tragic.

But no matter who we are, where we come from, the color of our skin, the accent of our speech, the slant of our eyes or the legends of our ancestors, we are all alike in one very important way: we are all desperately in need of a savior, and that savior is the Lord Jesus Christ. It has been said that death is the great equalizer

(even better than the one on your car stereo, I guess), but all of us, born with a silver spoon or on the dirt floor of an African hut, begin our lives spiritually dead. The price has been paid to redeem us, of course, to bring us to life forevermore, but, like any gift, it must be accepted to take hold of it.

“How then will they call on Him in whom they have not believed? And how are they to believe in Him of whom they have never heard? And how are they to hear without someone preaching? And how are they to preach unless they are sent? (Rom. 10:14-15)

If you are a follower of Jesus Christ, you have been sent. Period. I can’t say whether you’re obedient or not, but the Bible makes it abundantly clear that you have been sent. “Go therefore and make disciples of all nations” (Matt. 28:19), as Jesus commanded. I suppose we could have a talk about whether one who refuses to obey is actually a Christ follower if they refuse to, y’know, follow Christ, but I’m not the judge in these matters so we won’t get into it right now.

What we will get into is the question of tolerance and the question of our own personal little Prime Directives that society so pressures us toward. I’m pretty big on tolerance, actually, when it comes to people. I think there’s a big difference between tolerating people and tolerating sin, and I’m commanded to love all people. The sin I’m most concerned about not tolerating is in my own life. That’s the sin that should really disgust me, and yet it’s often the sin that’s easiest to explain away, isn’t it? (As a side note, local churches do have a God-given responsibility to deal with sin in their midst, but it’s not our focus here.) When the world—spiritually dead from birth—behaves like sinners, it really doesn’t catch me off guard. The Bible makes it pretty clear we live in a fallen world, and I think that the answer to that is to make disciples, not to petition Congress to hide the sins we’re most uncomfortable with. It is the Holy Spirit that changes hearts and lives. But I’m getting off track (yes, I know, we’re all very surprised...).

Technically, the quote is, "Luv is a verb."

The point I am trying to make here is that there is a massive difference between tolerating people and upholding a personal little Prime Directive to not engage them with the Gospel. As I mentioned earlier, tolerance is great, but we have a higher calling: to love. And love, alas, as DC Talk so memorably rapped once upon a time, is a verb. Just as a follower of Christ must actually follow Jesus Christ, so to love your neighbor as yourself will and must involve very real action, and no, I don’t mean sending out plenty of Valentines each year. My gosh—if you actually love someone, it’s a given that you’re going to tolerate them, yeah? Respect who they are, where they come from, what they believe, how they dress, what they like and so on...

If we lived in a perfect world free of conflict or problems, the call to love would be pretty straightforward, wouldn’t it? But the truth is that, in different circumstances, love can look different.

Put yourself in the comfy, white, low top sneakers of the maid at Country Inn and Suites. You look down the hall you are charged with cleaning and see several Do Not Be Disturbed signs hanging on the doors. On a normal day, you are very happy to obey the sign, to come back later to provide turndown service to those rooms. You wouldn’t dream of disturbing those guests, would you?

Except that this isn’t a normal day.

"I'm bored, Reginald. Shall we attack a hotel later?"
"Yes, lets."

A streak of tigers has infiltrated the comfortable, affordable hotel! Yes, I said a streak! I looked it up and that’s the correct term! These wily tigers (oh I love big cats) have already gnawed through the phone lines so there is no chance of phoning the guestrooms. Since the tigers have also gotten their hands on a master keycard (these are very smart tigers, which I think is pretty normal), the only possible way for these guests to be safe is if they lock themselves out on the balcony so that the firefighters outside can rescue them.

No cleaning toilets for you today! You get to be a hero!

You rush from room to room, delivering the crucial instructions to panicked guests. But then you come to Room 307. Oh dear! There’s a Do Not Disturb sign! What do you do?

I realize this is a tricky question. You, Consuela Gutierrez, Housekeeper Extraordinaire, have been taught to respect the guests and their desire for privacy. They might be offended if you violate their wish. They might yell at you! They might answer the door naked and that would get uncomfortable in a hurry. Of course, without your warning, they will surely be eaten.

I'm sorry I brought up Star Trek V, everyone. I'll
understand if you never visit my blog again.

One of the rationales behind the Prime Directive is that starship captains do not have the right to play God (incidentally, everyone would be better off if starship captains did not direct movies in which they met people playing God). If nature and the universe and fate and all have decided a people should be wiped off the face of the earth, then of course they should be! Unless, um, their technology is good enough, of course. I would suggest, however, that this is a very narrow, shallow way of thinking.

If man possesses an eternal soul, that needs to be taken into account.

If all roads do not lead to the same place after death, that needs to be taken into account.

If the choices we make on this earth has some bearing in what happens in eternity, that needs to be taken into account.

Eternity, as it turns out, is a long freaking time.

If every single person born on this planet possesses an inherent sin nature, if they are separated from God by default, that needs to be taken into account.

If all who reject Christ and His sacrifice on the cross will spend an eternity in hell, then that really, really needs to be taken into account.

If the message of Scripture is true, then the most unloving thing you can ever do is keep your yap shut about the Gospel. Is it rude to share our biblical beliefs with others? Is it disrespectful to their upbringing? Is it too personal? Is it none of our business? Is it bad form?

Who cares!?

If they die in their sins, they will be spending eternity—forever!—in a lake of burning fire! I don’t think there’s any possible way to exaggerate this. Not to be melodramatic but this is literally the biggest, most important news of all time. And I think it’s so easy to go through our day-to-day and somehow not see it.

Honestly, I believe in being tactful. I think it’s so important that, when we share our faith, we do so with gentleness and respect (1 Pet. 3:15). I think it’s shortsighted to harass and badger your friends about Christ to the point where they are no longer your friends because I think that a solid relationship that is constantly, if subtly, pointing toward Christ is more valuable than being a blowhard and not taking no for an answer. And I’m very dubious of going either to the street or the ball game with a big sign as The Way to Reach the World. I think that’s so much easier than truly investing in a relationship to try to reach someone and also so much less effective.

But think of it. Think about someone you love who does not follow Christ: a sibling, a friend, a spouse, a longtime coworker, whomever. Are you satisfied that you have done everything in your power (which of

Man without God is as incomplete as someone who starts
to watch Lost in the middle of season three and wants
to know what in the world is going on.

course will include a crapload of prayer, as only the Holy Spirit can change a heart) to reach them for Christ? Do they know your story, the life Jesus redeemed you from and the difference He makes in your day-to-day? Do they know His story? Are you salt and light in their lives? Do you live a life full of good works that will lead to others glorifying the Lord?

This isn’t to try to beat anyone up. We all know and care about people who don’t know Christ (and, if you don’t, CHANGE THAT NOW) and it can be heart wrenching to see them constantly reject the One they need so desperately.

But if you’ve bought into this world’s lie that you can only be a good friend by keeping your faith to yourself, then maybe it’s time to step back and take stock. Ask yourself: Do I really care about them? Do I really believe that the Bible is true? If you’re answering yes to both questions but you are not actively, personally looking for and making opportunities to share your faith, then you need to go back and ask the questions again. And again. And again. Because the math just doesn’t add up. It’s time to make a change.

I’m trying to find the story online so I can properly cite it and get the facts right, but my Googling is leaving me dry, so I’m going to paraphrase this as best I can. I’ve heard my Dad share it plenty of times in sermons.

A young man was once granted an audience with a famous preacher and evangelist, one who had led many to Christ in his fruitful career. I don’t recall who it was. Maybe Dwight Moody? Anyway, the young man excitedly told the old preacher that he wanted to be used by God, too, and he wanted to be a famous evangelist some day as well. The preacher smiled and sent the young man to look out the window of the hotel room where he was staying, and then to come back and report what he saw.

After taking a few moments to look, the young man came back and said, “Sir, it’s very busy today. I saw at

"I see...horseless carriages...! What devilry is this!?"

least fifty people of all ages going about their business. There were carriages and streetlights and vendors selling newspapers and fruit.”

“Look again,” the preacher replied.

The young man spent longer at the window this time, determined to pass this test. When he came back, he thought perhaps he had figured out what he was supposed to report on so he said, “I see the Creation of God Almighty! I see trees and grass and birds. I see the sky and clouds and the sun. Across the street, I saw some flowers blooming.”

A third time, the preacher sent the young man to the window. As the young man looked frantically for whatever he kept missing, the evangelist joined him and pointed down to the bustling people going about their days.

“If you want to be an evangelist,” the preacher said, “then you cannot look at a person without seeing a lost soul, desperately in need of a Savior.”

This is the true business of our lives. This is our Prime Directive, our number one purpose: to glorify God and to point always to Jesus Christ. Not only can we not truly love without sharing Him with those who need Him, I don’t think we can be particularly decent human beings. The stakes are so high I cannot possibly overstate them. Eternity hangs in the balance.

Just in case Jesus' calling isn't enough for you,
here's Uncle Sam also getting on your case.

I would like to invite you to leave, in the comments, the first name of someone whom you are actively trying to reach for Christ. I will pray for anyone you mention. If you’re reading this post, whether you’d like to leave a name or not, I’ll ask you to take a few moments and pray for any names listed here. Because, again, only the Holy Spirit can bring someone from death to life. But He can and does use us as well.

After all, how can they believe in One they’ve never heard of? And how can they hear unless someone tells them about Him? Congratulations. You just became someone. Now go do something with it.

Sex, Sex, Sex, Sex, Sex, SEX, Sex, Sex, Sex, Sex (and a Video Game called Catherine!)

Pretty much a currency in my house.

It has been pretty typical, in the past, when birthdays or Christmas come around, for us to want to get each other more presents than we really have money for. I doubt my family is unique in this regard! In fact, there have been a couple of years where my wife and I haven’t gotten each other anything for Christmas, instead buying gifts for each other whenever we get our tax refund in a couple of months later.

In line with this, there have been a number of instances over the years when I have been gifted or traded vague future promises of a subscription to video game-by-mail rental service Gamefly for this or that. If my wife wasn’t able to get  me much for my birthday, I’d get a month of Gamefly. Or sometimes she would trade me a month or two in exchange for taking her to Olive Garden or something. I can’t possibly tell you now how many months of Gamefly I am “owed.” I think that’s partially the point. But I was just able to cash in on a few months of it, and play a handful of games I was curious about or simply hadn’t received as a present (the manner in which I receive virtually all the video games I own; my Dad loved the commercials for Assassin’s Creed III so much that he was as excited when he got it for me as I was!). There was one game that I knew was going to be added to my rental queue the next time I got to cash in on some Gamefly. It’s called Catherine, it came out in 2011, and it is the inspiration for today’s theofictionology post.

Not pictured: Custer's Revenge.
Pictured: Butterflies.

If you’ve seen the cover art or any of the advertising for Catherine, you’re probably thinking it’s an odd choice for a young man of God to want to play. The marketing for the game is very clear about having sexual themes. Honestly, that’s one of the reasons I was interested in it. Now, of course, pornographic games do exist. One of the most famous is an old game called Custer’s Revenge; in it, the player controls General Custer who needs to evade arrow so he can get to a naked American Indian woman tied to a post and rape her.

You know, it sounds pretty bad when you lay it all out like that.

Yes, I will show you the Catherine cover art,
but with the understanding that you had
better not enjoy it.

And, no, I haven’t played it. But Catherine was nothing like this. Despite the cover art—and the frantic, almost cheesy anime aesthetic that the game sometimes indulges in—reviews praised it as a mostly mature attempt to explore adult themes in a video game. I even read an article in which playing the game inspired one gamer to come clean about infidelity in his past. And as a pretty hardcore gamer, there was no way I could ignore a game that was making a serious issue to take on a subject that games too often take a juvenile stance on, if at all.

I hope this goes without saying, but the movies, books, TV shows and games I discuss on this blog are never intended as an endorsement. Well, unless I recommend you go out and get them, and I do that sometimes with the books I read. But I’m not suggesting you rush out and buy Catherine and I’m sure as heck not suggesting you rush out and buy it for your teenage son. On this blog, our interest is in seeing what spiritual conversations can arise from fiction of all stripes. If you’re interested in the moral content of something like Catherine, I recommend checking out a site that specializes in that, such as CommonSenseMedia.org (here’s their take on Catherine). There are also Christian sites out there that do the same, but I’ve found some of them that get pretty darn silly and incredibly petty. Now back to our regularly schedule blog post.

Seriously, the game was a lot of fun to play!

Catherine features Vincent, a 32-year-old man who has been in a long-term relationship with his girlfriend Katherine but is very squeamish about committing further. No sooner does she start pressuring him for a more formal commitment than he suddenly finds himself waking up next to the buxom, perky Catherine after a night together he doesn’t even remember. His newfound relationship corresponds to intense, vivid nightmares in which he has to use a variety of tricks to climb to the top of a tower. The bottom floors start

dropping on a regular basis and sometimes monsters chase him. It’s a strange game.

It’s also a game in which the player is forced to deal with infidelity. They are not given a choice whether they want to stay faithful to Katherine—at least, not initially—so they need to deal with it. You can encourage or discourage the sexy Catherine (who, initially, I liked a lot better than Katherine, personality-wise). You can be loving or cold to your girlfriend. The choices aren’t nearly as pronounced as they are in Mass Effect or Skyrim, for instance, and sometimes I was annoyed that none of my options really lined up with what I wanted to say (or text someone, more likely), but I got over that. Plus, the climbing puzzler gameplay was surprisingly compelling—and difficult! But it was very satisfying to make it to the top. I enjoyed the game, and it gave me a taste of something that I never intend to sample in real life: I walked in the shoes of a cheater.

So you don't feel cheap, I've even invited Barry White
to swing by and set the mood with a little music.

So where are we going with this? Well, where do you think? Let’s talk about sex. 

I’ve noticed something in regards to TV shows and movies. I think we all can agree that Christian characters are often established simply to make fun of them. I would point out that real life is like that sometimes too; otherwise, why is Fred Phelps around? But sometimes a writer does explore someone with faith in a manner that goes beyond easy punchlines. The Shield has one of the best examples I can think of, in which police officer Julian struggles to balance his faith with his homosexual feelings. The writers treated him with respect and his personal battle added some real depth to his character and the show. Other TV shows that have treated Christian characters with respect include The Middle and Firefly.

But even when writers decide that Christians are people too and want to write them with sympathy, I have noticed that one of the concessions they often seem to make is that the believers in the show have no problem with premarital sex. Maybe I’m reading too much into this, but the message that I’m taking away is that, if we’re going to accept Christians as a decent human being, they need to consider the biblical prohibition against sex outside of marriage as antiquated and not relevant.

I would argue that it’s very relevant.

They decided to wait to have sex.
And, no, the fact that she is now a
Maxim cover girl does nothing to negate that.

When I was growing up—and some of you youngsters are going to think I’m yanking your yank-chain—it was normal for a teenage couple on a television show to struggle with whether they were going to actually have sex or not. The times were a-changing so they didn’t all opt to abstain, but it was a question, not a given. Cory and Topanga wrestled with it on Boy Meets World; even Angela Chase and bad boy Jordan Catalano struggled with the question in the acclaimed and aptly-titled episode “Pressure” of the quickly-canceled My So-Called Life. This wasn’t that long ago. How things have changed in our fictional worlds.

We would be naive to think that Christian culture doesn’t change with the rest of the world. Barna Group research indicates that nearly 60% of born again believers do not see a moral problem with premarital sex or living together outside of marriage. For those of you who aren’t taking a stats class right now (I have to mention that because fellow author Cynthia P. Willow, whom I interviewed a couple of months ago, is taking one and hates it), that means a majority of Christians in their twenties and thirties do think biblical prohibitions on premarital sex are antiquated and not relevant. Which I guess means I owe TV writers an apology! Their portrayal of modern Christians is right on the money.

I’m not going to belabor this point. I just want to make a couple of arguments, and then you can go on your merry, sexy way. Or your married, sexy way. That’s even better!

First argument: The Bible is very clear that you do not mess around when it comes to sex. I love to draw this comparison. When it comes to the Prince of Darkness, the devil himself, have you noticed the Bible’s instructions on how to deal with that old goat?

“Resist the devil, and he will flee from you.” - James 4:7

Of course, if the devil comes at you with sex,
things do get a bit confusing.

I love that! It’s wonderful, isn’t it? Let’s drop all this “the devil made me do it” crap. As a follower of Jesus Christ, your Master defeats ol’ Belial handily. You resist him, he flees. It’s wonderful.

But when it comes to sex, our instructions are a bit different:

“Flee from sexual immorality!” - 1 Cor. 6:18

Hold on. The devil was just fleeing in the last verse. Now we’re the ones who have to flee? What’s up with that!?

Satan comes at you with both barrels, resist him. With the Holy Spirit, you are stronger than him. A sexy lady or hunky Christian author starts giving you the googly eyes? Get the heck out of Dodge. You can’t handle this. When it comes to sexual temptation, get out of there. It will destroy you.

Second argument: Sexual sin can never be taken back. Of course, there are other sins like this—murder comes to mind—but often it is possible to make amends. If you lie, you can turn around and tell the truth. If you steal, you can return what you stole, or the value of it. I’m not saying it’s as cut and dry as that and there are always consequences, but sexual sin is not something you can ever go back on.

Let me give you a scenario. You’re a young  man who grew up in the church. You know what’s right and wrong but you’re super horny so you go ahead and have sex with your high school girlfriend. When you get to college, you get involved with Navigators (they disciple you!) and decide to really stop screwing around—

How can you even think about
letting her down?!

both sexually and in your faith. You repent, of course, and God forgives you—there is no doubt about that!—and you start living life for Him. Of course, as a man of God, you find your eye caught by a woman of God. And she’s been doing this longer than you, so she will be pure on your wedding day, never having been intimate with another.

You cannot give that to her. It’s too late. You two can get past it, of course, and I think you will. You and God already have, you might recall. But I guarantee you that the grief and regret you feel on your wedding night will overwhelm the temporary pleasure you got from getting frisky in the back of your Dad’s Subaru. No contest.

The third argument plays off the second. I think I first got this one from the youth ministry curriculum guide The Seven Checkpoints by Andy Stanley and Stuart Hall (a book I really liked when I did youth ministry). I’m bringing it up here because the response I hear most often is, “Huh. I never thought of that.”

Not pictured: Unspecified sex act.
Pictured: cute puppies in a basket.

Most of the people I know, Christian or not, desire a healthy, committed marriage someday in their future. Unless you really make your wife mad a lot, sex is one of the benefits of a healthy marriage. But sex outside of marriage corrupts your relationship in a way that you’ve probably never considered. Your sexual relationship with your spouse can never really stand on its own, because it is pretty darn near impossible to never bring in comparisons. You can’t help but think, to some extent, “Oh, I liked it better when [random ex-girlfriend] did [unspecified sex act] than how [random current wife] does it.”

Are you feeling romantic yet?

Now think about your spouse having those same thoughts. If you follow God’s plan, your relationship with your spouse will be great and satisfying in part because you’ll have nothing to compare it to. The more sexual partners you’ve had in the past, the more room there is for comparison. Is that something you want?

Of course, if you’re reading this blog, there’s a good chance that you consider yourself a follower of Jesus Christ. Sin in our life always separates us from God. We all struggle with different sins, too, and it’s quite possible that I struggle with sexual sin more than you do. Well, whatever your poison is, letting that in your life hinders your relationship with God and prohibits you from doing what you were put her to do: to be salt and light, to reach others for the Kingdom of God. That’s a big deal.

In the spirit of full disclosure, our soap
doesn't even come in a box.

I know I need to get off my little soapbox. We’re supposed to be talking about a video game after all, a video game in which the blanket assumption is sex outside of marriage because that’s the world in which we live (I can’t even say “culture” since this Catherine is a Japanese game). When we are so completely inundated with the same message—for example, that sex is not designed to be enjoyed only in a marriage relationship—we tend to start to believe it, just from the sheer repetition. Even if it’s a lie.

So thanks for listening to me chat about sex. My advice to you? Chat about it yourself. Christians need to get past their discomfort with this issue and bring it out in the open, because the enemy is not squeamish about it which means theirs is the loudest voice being heard (and sorry for being so melodramatic, but that’s the way it is). If we let the media do all the talking, then Christian young adults are going to internalize its message, not the truth of Scripture. This is true in all areas, but I don’t think I know another topic where so many believers are too embarrassed to speak up.

Heck, play Catherine side-by-side with your  kid if it helps. Pause the game and talk about how the sexual situations in it differ from what the Bible has to say. Give them solid reasons to follow God instead of the world. Be open about your own failures in this arena and they heartache that it has caused. But whatever you do, address it.

"I am so turned off right now!"
"Not as turned off as I am!"

Who knows? Maybe having all these old people talking about sex a lot will make the young ones so

embarrassed that they can never get in the mood again! Sure, the human race would die out without anyone procreating, but it’d still be a win for morality! Huzzah!

Oh! I just got a thought. I wonder, if I let my wife pick where we go to lunch tomorrow, if I might get another month of Gamefly out of it...it’s worth a try...

Addendum: I realized after writing this that there were times when I implied that I thought this was a teen or young adult issue. It’s not. It’s a spiritual issue. God designed sex for marriage whether you’re seventeen or seventy. Violating His principles will always hinder your relationship with Him, no matter your age; more than that, I would argue that going against your Creator will almost always have negative consequences as well. He made you. He knows how you work. He made sex. He knows where it belongs. Are you going to tell Him that you know better? Huzzah!